David Cameron watchin pron

The British government is attempting to stand — Canute like — in between the British public and online porn, passing regulations which will severely restrict the type of content which British pornographers can produce.

The prudes at DCMS have even issued a list of prohibited acts now prohibited under the Audiovisual Media Services Regulations 2014 which includes (via the Independent):

  • Spanking
  • Caning
  • Aggressive whipping
  • Penetration by any object “associated with violence”
  • Physical or verbal abuse (regardless of  if consensual)
  • Urolagnia (known as “water sports”)
  • Female ejaculation
  • Strangulation
  • Facesitting
  • Fisting

One problem: the whole thing is totally pointless because, errrm, foreign websites?

An upshot of this measure, revealed in an explanatory memorandum, is that the publicly funded regulator, the Authority for Television on Demand (ATVOD), will have to pay someone to watch porn and enforce the new regulations:

10.2 The impact on the public sector is that ATVOD will be required to ensure compliance with the revised requirements of section 368E. This is estimated to require a further case officer at a cost of £36,000 p.a.

No word on whether restraints are out — so the porn favourited from MP Karl McCartney’s Twitter account might still be okay.

  1. Can I please apply for the £2k a year. I promise I won’t enjoy watching any of the video and will be utterly honest and responsible in expressing my views about it. However I will consider the impact on the so far thriving UK erotic video sector on the health and wealth of the nation.

  2. No-one should be allowed to ban these activities without having first had them all thoroughly tested to make sure they are, in fact, harmful, and I’m happy to volunteer, especially for the face-sitting!
    Seriously though, what century are these people living in?

  3. Ever since prohibition days in the USA when they tried to ban booze all it did was make it even more popular. So what im thinking is far from trying to ban this some government ministers and MPs must have big shares in the porn industry and stand top make a killing out of the new popularity this idiocy creates and the increased clandestine sales

  4. Just a curious person says:

    Trying to stop facesitting is like wishing the world will stop spinning? Yeah right. And pigs might fly too. In fact, I like to see the authorities try to control it. Have they got the sex police running around checking people’s homes and making sure people do it right?​ However, if the ban relates specifically to videos online depicting facesitting and there is a chance the UK authorities can identify the UK participants, all you got to do is turn the camera 90 degrees and it will look like the woman is lying down and the guy’s head is still between her legs. And fortunately oral sex viewed from this new position is not banned in the UK. That should solve the problem.

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