In what has come as a huge blow for Glasgow City Council, The Simpsons writer Rob Lazebnik has revealed that Groundskeeper Willie — described by The Times as “the most recognisable Scot in the world” — officially hails from Kirkwall in Orkney. The news has prompted something of a diplomatic spat between Orkney Council and their counterparts in Scotland’s biggest city, who feature him on their list of famous Glaswegians.
The council were quickly backed up by their local MSP Liam McArthur. In what is doubtless a valuable use of parliamentary resources, a motion was filed in the Scottish Parliament:
*S4M-01921 Liam McArthur: Hands off Groundskeeper Willie — That the Parliament notes that it has been confirmed that Groundskeeper Willie of The Simpsons fame hails from Kirkwall, Orkney; understands that the revelation is made in an episode entitled The Daughter Also Rises, to be broadcast in America on 12 February 2012, where Willie confides in Bart that his father was a ‘doonie’ and his mother was an ‘uppie’, in reference to the two teams in the world-famous ‘Ba game’ … and calls on Glasgow City Council to renounce its claim to Orkney’s Groundskeeper Willie as a son of that fair city.
Scrapbook can now report that justice has been done, with the local authority updating their “famous Glaswegians” list as follows:
“Groundskeeper Willie – from the Simpsons. Once claimed he was ‘the ugliest man in Glasgow’, but now says he is from Orkney.”
Other entrants on the list include Donald Duck’s uncle, erm, Scrooge McDuck.