Category Archives: Europe

Greek fascist leader delivers Hitler-style speech

9:42am Tue May 8th

Neo-Nazis in Greece have celebrated their electoral success by partying like it’s 1939 — with jacketed heavies ordering journalists to stand and “show some respect” before a Hitler-style speech by leader Nikolaos Michaloliakos.

Guard: All rise! All rise! Show your respect!

Journalists: We just came in to record.

Guard: Whoever doesn’t want this, go out.

Journalists: What’s the problem? We were asked to rise up when you entered the room. We think this offends us.

Guard: Do it as a sign of respect!

Now leading a group of 21 in the Greek parliament, Michaloliakos jabbed his fist while ranting about immigrants turning Greece into a “jungle” and quoted Julius Caesar before thanking his black-shirted supporters.

Rumours that Nick Griffin has been sighted on a flight to Athens could not be confirmed.

French far-right success after consistent backing from Mail writer

12:00pm Mon April 23rd

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While the rest of Europe recoils in horror, at least one person will be pleased by the record performance of the far right National Front in French presidential election – and they’re a columnist for the Daily Mail.

Seduced, supposedly, by Marine Le Pen’s Euroscepticism, Richard Waghorne penned a puff piece in January in which the strident racism and holocaust denial of her Le Pen’s father Jean-Marie, who preceded her as National Front leader, are euphemistically referred to as “drawbacks”.

“it is becoming steadily more obvious that Marine Le Pen’s role in French public life is not merely legitimate but increasingly necessary.”

But Waghorne went further than this on Friday – with an article including a categoric endorsement:

“In present circumstances, given present choices, the only responsible vote in France next Sunday is a vote for Marine Le Pen, leader of France’s National Front.”

This from a newspaper which, errr, supported Benito Mussolini and Adolf Hitler.

President of Belarus: “I’d rather be a dictator than gay”

8:43am Tue March 6th

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Partying like it’s 1988, Belarus president Alexander Lukashenko retains Soviet-era controls on the economy and media, not to mention opposition groups.

As Germany withdrew its ambassador from Minsk last week, calling the regime “the last dicatorship in Europe”, Lukashenko hit back with a homophobic barb at German foreign minister Guido Westerwelle, remarking:

“I’d rather be a dictator than gay.”

Luckily for Alexander, his comb-over and almost toothbrush moustache make him a good fit for the former.

Euro Commissioner banned women from nude sauna briefing

12:25pm Mon March 5th

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A European Commissioner has faced accusations of sexism after a sauna-based briefing for nude journalists. The secret naked gathering was cut short when the Finnish vice-president of the European Commission objected to women being allowed in.

Olli Rehn treated the journalists to a communal shower and two sauna sessions, before storming out when news of the meeting spread through the European press room and women attempted to join, explaining later:

“I’m all for equality of the sexes but this was just pushing it too far…”

And in reports sure to have steam coming from Eurosceptic ears, it highlights the fact of the European Commission having a sauna within their Brussels HQ.

According to newspaper the Süddeutsche Zeitung (based in Bavaria and the home of the German sauna experience), a delegation from the UK were among those hosted by Rehn.

We hope they won’t be giving British parliamentarians ideas on Palace of Westminster upgrades.

Creepiest political ad ever? Voting for Putin is like losing your virginity

8:11am Tue February 28th

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A controversial Russian election campaign advert compares voting for Vladimir Putin to losing your virginity. While the clip perhaps showcases a gentler side to Russian politics than often violent campaign intimidation, this disturbing video is a masterclass in creepiness.

With a young girl informing a fortune teller that it will be her “first time”, a tarot card with Vladimir Putin’s image on it is followed by the slogan:

“Putin. The first time — only for love.”

This is not the first time Putin’s campaign has taken to full-blown sexual innuendo as an electoral strategy. Back in November, Scrapbook’s attention was drawn to a comparably disturbing video featuring a couple emerging tousle-haired after an encounter in, erm, a polling booth.

It seems Putin is picking up from where Berlusconi left off — as the dirty old man of European politics.

Drink/drugs MEP Bloom said student Parliament visitor had “good tits”

5:10pm Wed February 8th

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Following on from Scrapbook’s earlier story on Godfrey Bloom, the UKIP MEP who addressed the European Parliament after consuming a combination of drink and prescription drugs, it seems only fair to take this opportunity to paint a more detailed picture of our new boozed-up muse in the best way we know: a greatest hits of his idiocy.

Prolific in the art of foot in mouth, the member representing Yorkshire and the Humber was clearly expecting this day to come, with a litany of misogynistic, climate change denying and xenophobic comments lying in his wake:

Beginning with his first transgression, on assuming office in 2004, Bloom wasted little time before sparking controversy, suggesting he wanted to deal with women’s issues because: “I just don’t think they clean behind the fridge enough”.
Attempting to rectify this faux pas, the UKIP politician subsequently invited a group of female students to Brussels, only to be accused of sexual harassment and overheard commenting on a colleague: “Isn’t she the most delicious bimbette? Absolutely thick, but good tits”.
Away from misogyny and alcohol, the Yorkshire-based MEP has also vehemently denied man-made climate change, claiming it’s little more than a hypothesis.
Was faced with calls to resign after praising the French secret service for their role in sinking a Greenpeace ship in 1985.
And to complete the set, back in 2010, Bloom was ejected from the European Parliament after he heckled a German member of the chamber with the Nazi slogan: “Ein Volk, ein Reich, ein Fuhrer”, which means one people, one empire, one leader.

Tellingly, Godfrey Bloom admits he has always been “deeply suspicious of received wisdom”, with his track record, you wouldnt’ have guessed it!

UKIP MEP makes Euro Parliament speech on booze and drugs cocktail

12:31pm Mon February 6th

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A UKIP MEP has admitted being “drugged up” on a cocktail of alcohol and prescription painkillers while making a speech in the European Parliament. Godfrey Bloom (pictured above with party leader Nigel Farage) stumped colleagues in Strasbourg last week, interrupting a debate on sport with a bizarre question about a university rugby club.

Departing from his usually brisk and coherent delivery, Godfrey slurred his words as Tory MEP Emma McClarkin shook her head:

Bloom told Scrapbook that he was “drugged up” on “very heavy medication” after breaking his collarbone in a riding accident. But despite initial denials that he had been drinking, Bloom, who has previously had to be “carried out of the chamber” after drinking, eventually conceded that he had “probably had a couple of beers”.

Perhaps we should find Bloom’s “open letter to landlords” — in which the MEP brags at having drunk more than 17,000 pints in his lifetime — instructive:

“I take beer seriously …. I don’t go for ‘a pint’. I am a session man.”

We wish Godfrey a speedy recovery from his riding injury.

Eric Cantona launches bid to become president of France

11:00pm Mon January 9th

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Former Manchester United player Eric Cantona has launched a bid to become the president of France. The eccentric striker has written to mayors requesting that they nominate him for the contest to be held on 22 April, with a possible run-off on 6 May.

Planning to make housing a major theme of his campaign, he claims he was motivated to enter the contest due to his “keen sense of [his] responsibility to a time when our country is in front of difficult choices”.

Scrapbook trusts the 45 year-old he has learned to control his temper:

“Ooh ahh! Voix pour moi!”

Category Archives: Europe

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